Friday, July 3, 2015

BECAUSE EVERYONE IS SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED IN THE SUMMER, AUSTIN MAHONE RELEASES "DIRTY WORK"



Austin Hothone is joining the immense amount of young singers releasing slutty jams this summer. "Dirty Work" has a Justin Timberlake vibe to it that I'm really digging. It's got a sick beat, my hips, my damn hips don't lie! He tells his girl to "stop messing with Mr. Clean"... I don't think that company is going to like that line very much... #butthatsnoneofhisbusiness

Thursday, July 2, 2015

JASON DERULES THE TOP 10 RELEASES YET ANOTHER SMASH "CHEYENNE", BUT REFUSES TO LET "GET UGLY" HAVE ITS' WELL DESERVED MOMENT

*Waiting for you to give him that Pop throne, Ursher who?*

If you had told me Jason Derulo was going to be this Top 10 king, I would have laughed at your face. However, things do change and he finally got some good writers and producers. "Everything is 4" is an iconic album full of amazing tunes. "Cheyenne" is one of the standout tracks. Don't ask me what the song is about, though because I have absolutely no idea. The only thing I take from the song is that he never meant to fall in love and Cheyenne, but you know what? When your song is as great as this and the beat is amazing who cares if people don't know what you're singing about. Get them royalties, girl.

DEMI LOVATO CHOOSES TO BE KINDA LESBIAN FOR HER COMEBACK SINGLE "COOL FOR THE SUMMER"



It must be hard being Demi Lovato. She's so confused in life. Years ago she was talking about how she wanted to make quality music and how she didn't want to be slutty or whatever. She even went as far as throwing shade at Miley for being the liberated independent woman that she is. I mean people change, but damn... "Cool For The Summer" is light years away from that little girl. The song is just as confused as she is. It's like pop, rock, and some of that generic genre Max Martin makes.

"Cool For The Summer" is actually an amazing song. As confused as the beat is, it actually really works. She starts the song with "Tell me what you want, what you like. It's ok. I'm a little curious, too." Ok Demi, talk to me about that lesbian kiss. "Tell me if it's wrong, if it's right..." I see your insecurities and raise you 100. She then tells her lady friend to not "tell her mother" to "kiss one another" oh and also drops a hint at the termination of their fling "we're cool for the summer", winter, idk homechild, we'll see.

SELENA GOMEZ RELEASES BREATHEY-NARRATED MASTERPIECE "GOOD FOR YOU" WITH SOME RAPPER. FORCES ME OUT OF RETIREMENT



If you know me, you know I love me some Selena Gomez. She's my favorite Disney star and thankfully she continues to release great music. "Good For You" is one of the sexiest tunes Selena has released in years. "Good For You" is like the evil, thot twin of "Come & Get It" If "Come & Get It" was slutty, "Good For You" kicks it in the face and then takes its' significant other. Song be cruel and boss like that.